About two weeks ago I decided to attend a blogging conference in Orlando, Florida – without my family. Back in 2012-2014, I’ve attended other work-related events in Orlando that were on-site at Disney World where my Mom or my brother joined us with A.J. But this is a not a kid-focused event. BlogHer 17 is one of the biggest social media conference is for women who work and create content online. I’m going as part of my job as the community manager for The Network Niche, a diverse influencer network where we are a media partner.
Most of the logistics were worked out. My husband took off from work and A.J. will be in camp for the two weekdays when I’m gone. All of the child care, drop-off/pickup tasks were handled.
But oh, when I told the child that I was leaving for four days his whole life seemed to collapse.
His face immediately dropped and his mouth started spouting all types of utterings filled with mommy guilt:
Will you miss me while you’re gone?
Why can’t I come?
Why are you leaving me?
A.J. is a very pensive, emotional child so once I put him to bed that night the fact that I was leaving was still on his mind.
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He even came back out of his room to ask me even more guilt-ridden and tear-filled questions:
Will you be happier when you’re away for me?
In the last seven years, I haven’t been away from him longer than three days.
I took a weekend trip to Jekyll Island last August with one of my close friends, but we were back in two days.
I sense this will be the beginning of a huge adjustment for him and my whole family. Since he was born, I’ve only worked around his schedule as opposed to him having to accommodate to my schedule.
Although he’s not sure, I know A.J. will be OK with his Dad for four days. He’s attending a summer camp where he knows plenty of friends from school. But he knows that I am more likely than his Dad to stop at Chick-Fil-A or one of our favorite kids eat free restaurants on the way home. A.J. needs to see that his Dad is more than capable to take care of him too.
Comment below: What is your go-to way to avoid being filled with Mommy Guilt? Do you stay in constant contact with your family while you’re away?
I’ve shared some of my thoughts in these blog posts:
When Will the Mommy Guilt Stop?
What’s Your End Game?: The Question Every Mompreneur and Blogger Should Answer
My 2017 Goals: Get Out & Collaborate
3 Daily Goal Setting Tips for WAHMs
I will be at BlogHer this weekend as well. I don’t understand the Mommy guilt, but my boyfriend leaves Sunday to Germany for a month so I do feel the s/o guilt being away from him right before he leaves. One day your son will understand all the hard work you put in to support him – it’s good to see that he has a hard working mama!
Hope to get the opportunity to meet you at the conference.
It’s really a tough feeling to deal with. I’ve always worked full time and that alone creates mom guilt almost daily. “Knowing” you these past couple of years you do seem to have it together but as you’ve mentioned even the best laid plans of mice and men can go awry. AJ will be fine with his dad and his camp friends. Promise a treat or promise to go somewhere he likes when you get back. Of course you’ll surprise him with a gift from your trip. My Little Miss loves the Party City store, Sweetfrog and Smoothie King. Easy fixes, but it won’t stop the tears before or while you’re away. I have a girlfriend weekend from Friday to Saturday every year kand normally before bedtime we’ll call each other. We can FaceTime or video chat with Google hangout but it’s just two nights so we try to keep it simple. Believe me I’m far from being an expert but that works for us. Now mind you, daddy can be away and besides some questions from her, it doesn’t bother her he’s away. Mom rules!