Long Term Care Conversations With My Mom #CareConvo

My Father’s health took a turn for the worse around 2009 when I had just moved to Atlanta. In fact, he wasn’t well enough to travel to our wedding in Savannah, Georgia. I walked myself down the aisle at my wedding. A series of setbacks and surgeries sent him to the hospital and rehabilitation center/nursing home. He was in and out of several facilities more times than I can count. Then my Mother broke her wrist when I was pregnant with A.J. so I flew to New York to care for both of them. It was a pretty stressful time. By the end of 2010, my Father’s health deteriorated to the point where his prognosis was not good due to all of his health complications. There was nothing else that could be done, so my Mother and I had a much needed conversation about his long term care.

Long Term Care

Emotionally and financially it was best for our family to move him from the rehabilitative facility to home care. The social worker at the nursing home walked my Mother through the financial steps of what his long-term care would look like and it just didn’t make sense for us to keep him there. He was such a picky eater that he would never regain his strength of be able to fight off his illnesses with the facility’s food as his primary nourishment.

My Mother decided to make the most of our home’s first floor family room by moving his hospital bed there. Every meal – breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks – she prepared and sometimes puréed so he could eat. She found an at-home care service with daily nurse care that was covered by insurance. A local complimentary hospice service supported by volunteer who’d completed thorough background checks – allowed her some time to herself.  Each week a volunteer, Joe, came to stay with my Father so my Mother could attend weekly prayer service.

In the end, it came together as beautifully as we needed for him to be cared for and respected, for my Mother to have the flexibility she needed.

But what if my Mother wasn’t retired and able to stay home full-time? What if their insurance didn’t cover the bulk of the cost for his in-home care?

I recommend you have these long term care conversations with your parents, grandparents, siblings and your spouse ASAP. Learn more about how to have a conversation with our loved ones when you watch this video from CareConversations.org:

When you visit the CareConversations.org site, you’ll find easy to navigate menus. Invite your elderly loved one to look at the site with you, watch the interactive videos and search for solutions. I liked the bright colors, large font  and photos that makes it easier to view. Make your parents or grandparents part of the decision making process so they feel in control of their future and well-being.

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